Time flies so fast. Our bundle of joy turned three last August which means I’ve been a mother for three years and 2 months exactly today. Watching her grow, I know I’ve been a good mother but I admit, I’m still far from the ‘best’. When it comes to being the most caring mother and a hands-on mom, I feel so small for myself. There are even times that I avoid reading parenting articles because it just makes me feel guilty, that I am not doing my best. But as the years go by, I have this realization that motherhood is not just about giving the love, care and material things to our children. It’s also about testing ourselves for limits, making our hearts strong and improving our faith in HIM.
There are so many things I’ve learned already, yet I know there are still tons out there waiting for me. Analyzing everything, I have summarized them to 5.
1. Remembering always that OUR KID IS UNIQUE.
We already know the fact that we’re all created unique, we have different features, talents, attitude and intellect. But I am a mother who grew up finding myself always in a competition (someday, I’ll write an article about this). I know I have changed but there are times I see myself comparing again, this time involving my Louise. I compare her eating habits with other children, making me irritated of how picky-eater she is. I compare her language development, making me worried of why she’s a late talker.
But instead of stressing myself with these two issues, I try to focus on the positive side and appreciate how active our Louise is. I let my heart melt realizing how she makes us happy everyday, how resourceful she is and how good she is in exploring her world. She is indeed UNIQUE and I know she’ll eat and will later talk much when she’s ready.
2. Accepting that NOT EVERY DAY is a GOOD Day.
I am a mother who plans a lot and expects high. So having these characteristics, you probably know how bad my day gets when something doesn’t happen as planned. I hate the word but sometimes I become ‘immature’ when this happens, yelling to my one and only outlet – POOR FRED.
Messy home, unfinished household chores, Louise’s tantrums, you name it – these things are driving me crazy! It’s OK to feel bad (we’re humans for God’s sake!). What’s not OK though is to let those things ruin the day of everybody. I’ve learned this the hard way. So to cope up, when I’m starting to feel upset, I just remind myself that there’s still tomorrow. If we couldn’t go to the mall early because we woke up late and didn’t finish the chores on time, then fine. This just means we need to stay home instead, watch movies and have some playtime together as family before going to bed.
3. KIDS can get SICK no matter how HARD we TRY in keeping them healthy.
Louise already got sick (UTI – Urinary Tract Infection) as early as 3 days old. Instead of enjoying our first day with her at home, we’re damn worried because of her fever. There was a brief moment when Fred and I regretted of bringing her home that early. We found ourselves wanting to bring her to ER (fever was 38 degrees and we’re acting crazy already!) but we calmed down and wait for morning to see the doctor. It was traumatic for new parents like us so we tried everything to keep her always clean, safe and healthy. But for some reason, at 10 months old, Louise was hospitalized due to diarrhea (caused by UTI). And at 27 months old, she was hopitalized again due to very high fever. Thank God it wasn’t dengue but it was another UTI.
Knowing it was the 3rd time she had UTI but not knowing the real cause made us even more tense and paranoid. But as parents, being weak is the last thing we need to become. Instead of fighting and blaming, Fred and I are now learning to take the situation calmly. We try our best to act normal in front of our baby whenever she’s sick and we still play with her if she wants to. Understanding the situation really makes a big difference!
4. Embracing the FACT that ANNOYING People EXIST.
The moment I became a mother, the world introduced me to two new types of annoying people. I’m not saying I hate them. I meet them every now and then and thank GOD I have mastered to ignore what they say and just move on.
a. People who will tell you how to do it
I’ve been always a good listener but when someone tells me I’m not doing the right thing as a mother, it would be the other way around. I already heard someone told me that I am not doing enough to improve Louise’ eating habits and I couldn’t help but just closed my ears. These people are just not aware how ‘meal time’ looks like in our home. That it is a battle where we as parents are always the losers and there’s our baby crying and screaming for victory!
b. People who don’t appreciate your kid
After my delivery, I noticed that there were some people who were not that excited to see our newborn baby. I admit I was hurt but as years went by, I realized that what matters most is the love Louise gets from people close to our hearts.
5. PRAY HARDER.
In my 29 years of existence, I feel very blessed to witness God’s grace pouring in me. Graduating with honors, having a job not long after I graduated and marrying a very good husband were all part of my prayers which HE granted for me. So I have never doubt of how effective prayer is. However, the moment I got pregnant, I had that feeling that how I used to pray won’t be enough. I then doubled my prayers to keep me and our baby safe and healthy. I had a very rough pregnancy but all went well thanks to HIM, just look at our baby now, busy exploring the world!
When Louise came out to this world, I tripled my prayers. I pray for her good health. I pray for her developments, her safety and for her future. Accidents happen, sickness happens but all will be OK if we team up with HIM!